Ecclesiastes 7:26 And I find something more bitter than death: the woman whose heart is snares and nets, and whose hands are fetters. He who pleases God escapes her, but the sinner is taken by her.  Behold, this is what I found, says the Preacher, while adding one thing to another to find the scheme of things— which my soul has sought repeatedly, but I have not found. One man among a thousand I found, but a woman among all these I have not found.  See, this alone I found, that God made man upright, but they have sought out many schemes. (ESV)
Houston, we have a problem. And it’s not with women! Solomon has partied more than anyone will ever party and has built more than Donald Trump can imagine. He moves from the party scene to the women scene. Yes, I said women and not woman. So, he starts with trying to find a mythical creature. (i.e. a woman who will fill all of the emptiness in his heart.) The problem is that the first wife didn’t work, so he married wife number two. Before you know it, he had 700 wives and 300 concubines.
I’m going to go on a limb here and suggest that the problem wasn’t the women; rather the problem lied within Solomon. Our boy Solomon has a sexual issue. Solomon viewed women as merely a tool to fill his sexual needs. Furthermore, in Solomon’s efforts to fulfill his desires, he got caught up with some women who enticed him away from the Lord and into the worship of idols.
Sadly, the search for “the one” (aka the mythical creature that doesn’t exist) and the search to have our sexual fantasies met continues today for both men and women and leads to destruction. Although we won’t have 700 spouses and 300 hookers at our side, our problems today may be in the form of pornography or sex with multiple partners.
Let’s all collectively agree that, like Solomon, our view of sex and our view of marriage is broken. Every Sunday there are men and women sitting in our churches who are struggling with an addiction to pornography. There are men and women in our churches who are having sex with every person they come in contact with. What about the married men and women in our churches who are flirting with someone who isn’t their spouse and even having affairs? We find ourselves in the same predicament as Solomon – we are trying to fill an emptiness in our hearts that only Jesus can fill. This is something that so many people are struggling with and most churches are silent on the issue.
Could it be that in our search for “the one” that God is wanting us to find contentment in Him, make us more like Him, so that we can be a better “one” for our future or current spouse? Could it be that in our search of having our sexual needs met that we are exposing how selfish we are and we are trying to fill a void that will never be filled? There is not a man or woman that can make you feel complete. Only Jesus possesses the power to make us whole and complete.
How could your view of relationships, marriage, and sex change to where it’s not all about you?
“All sorts of hearers come to this place, and they will be the first to say, ‘The preacher should not mention such a subject as sex.’ My answer to that remark is, ‘then you should not commit such iniquity, and give me reason to speak of it.’” Charles H. Spurgeon